Economics explained.

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Lad
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Economics explained.

Post by Lad » Sat Mar 31, 2007 10:03 pm

SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows.
The Government takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM:
You have 2 cows.
The Government takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM:
You have 2 cows.
The Government takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM:
You have 2 cows.
The Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away...

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows
But you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION:
You have 5000 cows
None of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN IRISH FARMER:
You have two cows.
You claim government subsidies for eight cows
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appleton
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by appleton » Sat Mar 31, 2007 10:13 pm

Hehe, Great one :)
"Practical men who believe themselves to be quite exempt from any intellectual influence, are usually the slaves of some defunct economist. Madmen in authority, who hear voices in the air, are distilling their frenzy from some academic scribbler of a few years back" - John Maynard Keynes

Lass
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by Lass » Mon Apr 02, 2007 9:16 pm

Love the stereotypes lol! :P
Above all, I would teach him to tell the truth ... Truth-telling, I have found, is the key to responsible citizenship. The thousands of criminals I have seen in 40 years of law enforcement have had one thing in common: Every single one was a liar. [JE Hoover]

anildewani
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by anildewani » Sat Jan 31, 2009 9:51 am

Great definitions, with examples :P

i hope i will write them down in my exam paper :D
will surely get A+ grade ;)

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ford007
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by ford007 » Sun Feb 01, 2009 3:11 pm

Hmm.... so you think Communism is better than Nazism and Fascism. Both are evil in my opinion. I can't find any differences between Communism and Nazism.
Enough of (ZA)Nu Labor. BNP is the only real alternative.

Renu Thapliyal
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by Renu Thapliyal » Mon Mar 02, 2009 5:58 pm

Good one...keep it up.
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code1
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by code1 » Wed Aug 12, 2009 9:25 pm

not bad i would debate but i like it ,it makes sense,so if it makes sense then there is no need to debate,right

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Dirk
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by Dirk » Fri Aug 14, 2009 2:37 pm

If you made the interpretation that Communism is Stalinism, then yes. But the truth is that Stalinism is far closer to Fascist Nazism than Communism. Stalinist nations such as the Soviet Union, China and Cuba basically ignored Marxist theory and instead followed Lenin and Mao. Cuba could have avoided Stalinism if it wasn't for the United States, which forced the nation into a similar isolationist situation as the USSR. The USSR thus had an undue influence on them and thus incorporated it under Stalinist doctrine.
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denisjhon
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RE: Economics explained.

Post by denisjhon » Tue Sep 29, 2009 8:09 am

Hi,
Great definition with appropriate example. Certainly, humorous.
Keep up the same work.

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